Don’t let others tell you what you can’t do

Self limiting beliefs (you know, those things that creep into our “self-conscious” where we sabotage our self image and credibility) are bad enough, but THEN you have other people that add to those doubts.  It goes something like this.  I’ll tell people that I’m writing a book and beginning a speaking career and here are some of the responses that I’ve gotten.

  • Who do you think would buy your book?
  • How many speeches have you given?
  • What makes you think you have anything to say that others haven’t heard before?
  • What gives you the authority or the right to tell others what to do?
  • What type of certification do you need before you can do that?

And, these are comments from my family and friends!  I get it.  They want to make sure that I don’t get hurt and I appreciate that, but this isn’t helpful.  I wish that they would think of a constructive way of protecting me.

Before these questions come out of there mouths, I wish they’d say “that’s awesome” …”can I get a signed copy of your book?”…”you are and will continue to be an inspiration.”

I know this may seem that I’m “oversensitive” and “needy.”  That’s probably true, but don’t put a label on me.  Don’t put a label on anyone.  People grow and change.  Don’t think that because you knew me in high-school that you still know me.  Maybe I’m better, maybe I’m worse but I’m certainly not the same.

So, what can you do?  Listen carefully to the words of others.  Be keen at identifying those that are speaking the words that you want to hear.  If they’re your family, you can’t disassociate yourself from them.  You don’t want to tune them out.  If you can, you want to help them understand your position.

I know, it’s not always that easy.

However, when you do get with people that believe in you…unconditionally…you HAVE to make the most of it.  By that I mean, share your hopes, wants and dreams.  This is where true inspiration comes. Knowing when you have others around you with “like minds” is where the magic happens.  This is where life gets breathed into your dreams.

If you’re wondering how you can find such a place, send me a note.  I’d love to help you.

This entry was posted in Eye Need Hope, Friendship, Leadership, Relationship, Uncategorized and tagged , , , by Brian. Bookmark the permalink.

About Brian

Hello, I'm Brian Wagner. I'm the father of three and the husband of one. Before I was any of that I was the youngest of ten that grew up on a tomato farm in Northwest Ohio. Life wasn't always easy. Some think that I was spoiled growing up as the baby. Well I'm still the baby and I'm still growing up. Maybe those two things are related. When I was ten years old I started to have have severe headaches and eventually blacked out. It took the doctors quite some time but they eventually decided that I would have to have a shunt put in that drains fluid from my brain to my abdomen. This put an end to my aspirations to be a great football player. Since then, I've had brain surgery, been in a coma (a few times) and have been left with limited use of my eyes. When the issue of March 2011 took place, I decided that I needed to do something about it. It's my mission to help people overcome adversity, just like I have, and have HOPE for the future. My kids need to know my story, but so does the world. I hope you enjoy my website Here is where I will serve my tribe. Please pull up a chair and feel free to join us.

3 thoughts on “Don’t let others tell you what you can’t do

  1. I heard you speak at graduation. Yes I remember back that far. You have always been awesome and whatever you do, you will be awesome. You go for it. Just let me know where I can get tickets to hear you speak and how I get my book signed by one of the best guys I have ever known. Take care my friend.

  2. I went to a seminar once where it was pointed out that you can tell if you are a good listener if you are actually listening to what the other person has to say rather than anxiously waiting to put your two cents into the conversation. I think frequently we would be better off listening rather than speaking.

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